Is the concept of shame completely lost to society today? The more I observe, the less I see people even conceive of shame or guilt. Is there anything that would be considered shameful at all in America today?

In the last couple months, I've now heard of three different "contests" where people compete, either by writing, calling, or just being randomly selected, to celebrate "Back to School" -- only it's not celebrating "Back to School," it's celebrating "The Kids Are Out of the House and Back In School." And no, that's not my interpretation of it, one radio station called their promotion something like "Let's Party, The Kids are Back in School."

If you openly and publicly celebrate your children going back to school, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Go ahead, call me all sorts of names. Feel free to tell me that I don't understand. Tell me that I don't get it. Tell me I can't comprehend it. I will not change my position. You are sending quite a message here, when you publicly celebrate your children being sent away from you for 8 hours a day.

How would you feel if you stayed with me for the weekend, then I posted about a celebration I was having to celebrate your leaving? The kids know this. The kids get it. The kids don't understand why you hate them so much that you want to celebrate sending them away.

Now I'm not talking about a sense of relief, or a sense that things will be calmer around the house during the day. I'm talking about a public, open celebration. You ARE sending a message to your children. The message is: I DON'T WANT YOU HERE. Nice message. If you don't want to raise kids, don't have them. If you have them and don't want them, talk to a church or adoption center and let someone have them who does want them.

What, did you think your responsiblity for your children ended after conception? Did you think that it's the state's responsibility to raise them once they're 5 years old? If you truly love your children and desire them, you should be disappointed they're away from you all day long for 9 or 10 months of the year. And again, I'm not talking about the slight relief you feel once you've packed them all off and the house is quiet.

You should not celebrate openly that your children will be away from you. You should not brag to others on the phone that you're "relieved" that the kids are back in school. The kids can hear you and see you. They are getting the very clear message that they're not wanted. Think about it.

For those who have read this far and still hate me for calling you out on this one, don't worry, some day your children will grow up and leave you. Then you won't have to deal with them at all during the day or night.

Posted by: Ogre at 04:01 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 503 words, total size 3 kb.

1 I don't have school aged children, but I think, it is less a celebration that the kids are gone and more a celebration of surviving the summer. Of course, I'm not sure that it is right either way. I, for one, can't wait to see my kid, and suspect that I would not celebrate "Back to School". Seems to me that back to school means back to the carpools, events, expenses, etc . . . that summer just does not entail. Oh, and who could hate you, you cute little Ogre you . . .

Posted by: oddybobo at October 03, 2006 07:04 PM (mZfwW)

2 "You should not celebrate openly that your children will be away from you. You should not brag to others on the phone that you're "relieved" that the kids are back in school. The kids can hear you and see you. They are getting the very clear message that they're not wanted." I agree! My parents never celebrated the resumption of classes. In fact, I don't recall parents' in the 50s or 60s having any such celebrations.

Posted by: AlwaysOnWatch at October 03, 2006 11:20 PM (vFS/o)

3 Yes Ogre, many people think that the school system is supposed to raise there kids and make them responsible people. It has been going that way since the 50's.

Posted by: Arbitratorofall at October 03, 2006 11:41 PM (5+Jvh)

4 It's no wonder so many kids are doing drugs, joining gangs and becoming sexually active. Rejection hurts worse and longer than physical abuse.

Posted by: Patty-Jo at October 04, 2006 01:09 AM (275FB)

5 But yet there ARE so many people who openly celebrate this. I just don't get it. I don't understand people who will have children and then take this attitude. What do they think? Do they believe their "job" is to have a kid, and that's it? What is really scary is that some people do -- and that's moving high speed down the road to communism, where the state is responsible for everything. Thanks for stopping by, everyone.

Posted by: Ogre at October 04, 2006 11:50 AM (oifEm)

6 Ogre, I agree with you. I have heard of lots of parents with that "lets go celebrate the first day of school" attitude. My husband and I are enjoying raising our 16, 14 and twin 12 year old children. I hate the end of summer! I would prefer that the school day was only 3-4 hours long and then I'd have my kids back. When we first had our children I read that a child's personality is formed during their first 5 years. So I knew I would be a stay-at-home mom at least until our youngest was past 5. By the time the twins were 5, there was lots of volunteering in school and those after school hours of activities and homework. Right after school is the time my kids open up and talk about their day, their teachers and friends- especially our high schoolers! We not only love our kids- we honestly LIKE them and appreciate the time we have with them. Some of us still happily raise our children without the "village."

Posted by: Lee at October 04, 2006 05:24 PM (YqrQb)

7 Very glad to hear it, Lee. Indeed, saying at home during the first five years really is critical, I'm very impressed that you did that, no matter what it took. Now if I can just talk you out of letting them in that horrible government-run system of "education..." (And yes, I know YOUR school is good, it's everyone elses' that's bad... )

Posted by: Ogre at October 04, 2006 07:45 PM (oifEm)

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