February 13, 2006
"This wheat should be planted," she said. "Who will plant this grain of wheat?"
"Not I," said the Duck.
"Not I," said the Cat.
"Not I," said the Dog.
"Then I will," said the Little Red Hen. And she did.
Soon the wheat grew to be tall and yellow.
"The wheat is ripe," said the Little Red Hen. "Who will cut the wheat?"
"Not I," said the Duck.
"Not I," said the Cat.
"Not I," said the Dog.
"Then I will," said the Little Red Hen. And she did.
When the wheat was cut, the Little Red Hen said, "Who will thresh the wheat?"
"Not I," said the Duck.
"Not I," said the Cat.
"Not I," said the Dog.
"Then I will," said the Little Red Hen. And she did.
When the wheat was threshed, the Little Red Hen said, "Who will take this wheat to the mill?"
"Not I," said the Duck.
"Not I," said the Cat.
"Not I," said the Dog.
"Then I will," said the Little Red Hen. And she did.
She took the wheat to the mill and had it ground into flour. Then she said, "Who will make this flour into bread?"
"Not I," said the Duck.
"Not I," said the Cat.
"Not I," said the Dog.
"Then I will," said the Little Red Hen. And she did.
She made and baked the bread. Then she said, "Who will eat this bread?"
"Oh! I will," said the Duck.
"And I will," said the Cat.
"And I will," said the Dog.
"No, No!" said the Little Red Hen. "I will do that." And she did.
And then the Duck, the Cat, and the Dog screamed about the unfairness of the system. The Duck cried that it was unfair that the Little Red Hen got all the breaks in life. The Cat whined that the original grain of wheat belonged to all people because it was found on the earth, and therefore everyone, especially this children, were entitled to the bread. The Dog yelled that is was unfair that the Little Red Hen were able to work while others didn't have the opportunity to work, and it wasn't fair that the Little Red Hen owned property at all. Then the three of them formed a committee to discuss the bread. After various meetings, often held up by attempts by the Duck to filibuster, they voted that everyone should have a share of the bread except the Little Red Hen. They also voted to protect all future grains of wheat from exploitation; to pass a law that would ensure that no one would be able to work more than one hour a day (because that would be unfair to those who weren't working); and they also voted to fine the Little Red Hen for using more resources on the earth than was her share to use.
However, by the time they finished all their voting, they found that the Little Red Hen had taken her bread and left the barnyard.
This angered the Duck, the Cat, and the Dog. They wanted that bread -- they felt they were owed that bread. So they organized the rest of the barnyard and formed an army to go after the Little Red Hen. They called their army the Irate Re-breadening Soldiers. They wanted to send their army after the Little Red Hen, but she was beyond the fence of the barnyard.
So instead, they decided to seize the assets of the Little Red Hen. They took her nest and all the things in it. They took all the tools she had used to grow the wheat -- the sickle, the thresher, the wheelbarrow, and her oven. They did not use these items, no, they seized them and put them in a storehouse to collect dust.
They passed laws that would financially reward anyone who reported the Little Red Hen to the authorities. They prepared everyone to capture the Little Red Hen on sight as soon as she entered the barnyard again. Of course, they had to raise taxes on all the other barnyard animals to pay for all these things, but since they were owed that bread, they were going to spare no expense -- after all, they were trying to get this bread "for the children" of the barnyard.
The Little Red Hen did not come back right away. The Duck, the Dog, and the Cat, however, could not stand still while waiting. They continued to pass laws of the barnyard to ensure that no one else would make any bread while they waited. At first, they just paid other animals not to grow bread. This was rather expensive, so they had to raise taxes once again.
However, that just wasn't enough -- the Duck, the Dog, and the Cat couldn't do nothing -- they had to keep doing something, anything. They then banned sickles across the barnyard. They passed laws making grains of wheat protected, preferred, citizens of the barnyard. They passed regulations making ovens so expensive that no one else (other than the Duck, the Dog, and the Cat) could afford them.
After all this time, of course, the Duck, the Cat, and the Dog were getting rather hungry. When they realized that no one in the barnyard could actually make any bread for them, they simply contracted with the neighboring barnyard. Now, they didn't want everyone in the barnyard to get bread -- if they did, their quest to get the Little Red Hen's bread would be over -- because no one would need bread. Instead, they contracted with another barnyard to get bread for themselves, but no one else.
They put in place limits on the amount of bread that could be imported. They then put huge taxes in place to heavily tax the import of any bread -- except, of course, bread that was for their own personal use. They then had their bread and their endless quest for the Little Red Hen's bread.
One day the Duck, the Cat, and the Dog all went out for a walk to survey their kingdom -- the barnyard. As they were walking along the fence, they saw the Little Red Hen scratching in the field on the far side of the fence. They quickly ran over to the Little Red Hen.
The Duck said, "Little Red Hen, give us your bread! You owe it to the barnyard to give your bread to us."
The Little Red Hen replied, "How can I owe it to you when I earned that bread? I worked hard for that bread, and you refused to work and make the bread?"
The Duck said, "It is your duty to give that bread to us. If you do not, we will take your things from you."
The Little Red Hen smiled and said, "You have already taken all I have. I have nothing more for you."
The Duck quacked out, "You are selfish and evil!"
Then the Cat called through the fence to the Little Red Hen, "But we will all starve without the bread -- don't you care what happens to us?"
The Little Red Hen said, "Of course I care. That is why I offered to let you help me."
The Cat cried, "But then you have to give us your bread!"
The Little Red Hen replied back, "No, I do not have to."
The Cat screamed, "You only want to kill the children!"
The Little Red Hen went on scratching.
Finally, the Dog bounded up to the fence. He looked over and called out, "Little Red Hen, doesn't your God require you to help others?"
The Little Red Hen said, "Yes."
The Dog called out, "But then you must help us now, by giving us your bread, or you are disobeying your own God!"
The Little Red Hen scratched a little more, then tossed something towards the fence. "Here," she said, "is a grain of wheat. That is all the help you will take from me."
The Duck, the Cat, and the Dog were furious. They threw the grain of wheat back at The Little Red Hen. They stomped off, discussing what new laws they could propose for the barnyard. As they were walking away, they saw a pig walk over to the fence and look at the Little Red Hen.
The pig grunted, "Little Red Hen, would you please share your bread with me and show me how to make bread myself?"
The Little Red Hen walked over to the pig and said, "Surely I will, but not in THAT barnyard."
The pig joined the Little Red Hen and lived happily ever after. The Duck, the Cat, and the Dog? Well, they're still taking more from their barnyard and passing more laws -- and no one is happy in THAT barnyard.
(Linked to Euphoric Reality's Drop Zone).
Posted by: Ogre at
02:03 PM
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